Suggestions

1. Coming to a doctors appointment high is never cool...especially when there is a tiny critter feeding off whatever you put in to your body.

2. You do not need to go to the ER for nausea or for a UTI. These can all be managed in a clinic!

3. Antibiotics are for bacteria. Viruses are not bacteria.

4. Some amount of pain is normal. As my last attending liked to say "pain means you're alive".

5. There is no pill for the shortness of breath you are experiencing from the pack a day you are smoking and your obesity.

6. When you come in requesting a pap smear seven months after your last one, maybe you should rethink some of your choices.

7. You have no feeling in your feet? Yes, this concerns me. But when you let me know that you aren't compliant with your diabetes medications and are eating fast food for every meal don't be shocked when I'm not jumping out of my seat to figure out what the heck is going on.

8. STOP SMOKING!!!! We aren't just saying this cause we like the sound of our own voices (okay, some of us do).